Hmm Here's a New update

V. day is coming and I still do not know what to get for my dear Jason, and he already asked me what do I Want. In which I replied him a bracelet.(in which I guess I'm correct in conjunction to V.day.)
I always fancy those things and I Really like bracelet for some reason.

Missing Jason alot recently. Dont know why. Just been thinking about him almost all day long.
Am I falling sick?
Kekekeke
Just joking la
I love him lor.. And I Really do.
我爱他多过爱我自己。。。
Anywayz I hate myself PRONTO!
Dont ask me why. I do not know it either..
Ah well
Today's exam paper is exceptionally easy. In which is a big surprized. Looks like I Shouldnt have burn the midnight oil last night since its so easy. Maybe coz I did thats why I find it easy for all the stuffs I Studied came out lor.
Kekekeke. Looks like it pays to study hard eh...
Ok la.. I go study for my tomorrow's paper le. Electrics 3
Take care everyone. Bb
Dear I love u ^^
*muackz*

Some quiz

Your gender:: Female
Straight/Gay/Bi:: Straight
Single?: Nope. I love Jason =]
If not, do you want to be?: ...
Birthdate:: 8/7/85
Your age:: 20
Age you act:: I onli know is kid
Age you wish you were:: fine wif my current age
Your height:: 5"7 or 1.75m
Eye color:: Light Brown
Happy with it?: Yup
Hair color:: Dyed it Red.
Happy with it?: yea
Lefty/righty/ambidextrous:: Righty
Your living arrangement:: I'll post up a pic soon
Your family:: Mum,Dad, Elder Sis n bro
Have any pets?: Chihuahua (dog)
Whats your job?: Poly Student
Piercings?: Yes
Tattoos?: No
Obsessions?: Games n Comics
Addictions?: -NiL-
Do you speak another language?: Not Really
Have a favorite quote?: w/e
Do you have a webpage?: No
Do you have any secrets?: Nth 2hide
Do you hate yourself?: Alot
Do you like your handwriting?: no
Do you have any bad habits?: Hot Tempered
What's your biggest fear?: Not Being loved by my bf
Can you sing?: No.
Do you ever pretend to be someone else just to look cool?: No
Are you a loner?: Very
If you were another person, would you be friends with you?: ??
Is there anything you fear or hate about yourself?: My attp
What is your greatest strength and weakness?: Strength: Nice 2pple Weakness: Bloody Naive
Do you think you are emotionally strong?: No.. Mi a weak gurl
Is there anything you regret doing/not doing in life?: Spending all my bank money away
Do you think life has been good so far?: Wif Jason yes. Normal no
What do you like the most about your body?: Eyes n lips
And least?: Figure
Do you think you are good looking?: No
Are you confident?: Never
Smoke?: hate both smokin n smokers
Sleep with stuffed animals?: Yes yes yes~!
Take walks in the rain?: Ya
Talk to people even though you hate them?: Depends
Drive?: Gonna learn

Love and All That
Do you consider love a mistake?: No. It is one of a kind
What do you find romantic?: Being with Jason?
Turn-on?: Jason
Turn-off?: Those stupid fuking despo
First kiss?: My first bf
If someone u had no interest in had interest in dating u how would u feel?: I find it weird talking to them
Do you prefer knowing someone before dating them or going: I already got my bf Jason. No thx
Have u ever wished it was more socially acceptable 4 a girl 2 ask a guy out: I'm fine with it. Note: I'm a gal
Have you ever been romantically attracted to someone physically unattractive: Wad the hell is this supposed to mean
Do you think the opposite sex finds you good looking?: Nope. I suxs
What is best about the opposite sex?: If its my bf. I love love him all
What's the last present someone gave you?: My sis gib mi a nokia6230 n a samsung mp3 player
Are you in love?: Yuppie. Jason.
Do you consider your significant other hot?: Not jux hot. Handsome too

Right This Moment...
Are you going out?: Juz got home -_-
Will it be with your significant other?: Hmm.. He's sleepin
Or some random person?: Not going out
What are you wearing right now?: Pajamas
Body part you're touching right now:: My face
What are you worried about right now?: Jason
What book are you reading?: Non
What's on your mousepad?: DOH. MOUSE LA
Use 5 words to describe how you're feeling:: Lonely, Sickly, Stressful, Missing my Dear and sleepy
Are you bored?: *nods*
Are you tired?: *nods*
Are you talking to anyone online?: Ya. My friend in irc
Are you talking to anyone on the phone?: No
Are you lonely or content?: Lonely
Are you listening to music?: Ya. Music from my comp.

I juz wanna say

Jason.
I really love you de...
And I believe u feel the same way also.
I know I always make u angry, but... thanks for being with me all these time..
爱你一生一世。。。
我是真心爱你的我会永远永远一直爱着你的 =]
*muackz*

Hmm... A New Year, And some New Updates

今年是新的一年.大家好吗?我自己还不错...最近因为了一点小小的误会差一点和我的男朋友吵...不过是我一个人在胡思乱想不能怪他,因为我没有去问他, 他跟那个女孩是什么关系...
Ok. Back to topic.
School has start for me and classes isnt that good either,,
So boring and tiring.
Recently my brother has lost his work and I dont get to use the computer. (lets juz hope he gets a job and my dad can stop nagging about him le)
Going home is so boring.
I Rather stay outside and rot with my friends...
Home got nothing to do.
There's only two exam modules this semester so I better do well for it otherwise my mom will start nagging non stop again. Hahahaha...
Poor poor me.. =p
Kekekeke.
Oh ya, my blanky has open a hole. Imma gonna buy a new one later.
Using the handphone in the school library is so stressful.. The sms tone cannot be too loud otherwise everyone around you will turn around and look at u...
AHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*Ish scared*
Wahahahaha...
Ah well.... Lets see...
The final year project for my team is like crap, we need to buckle up befor Mr Ying Says anything else...We try our best not to let him down....*prays*
Wahahahha
Now in the school library.
This morning accompany Jason to school and thus.....
I'm in school early.
Class is at 1pm today and I reach the school at 9+ today...
Eep~
!Hmmz..... Lunch time now and I'm not hungry either.
Hehehehe30mins more till the next lesson and I'm glad that lesson is starting soon...
otherwise I'm bored to death bery soon...
Ok la.. I tink I will stop this update here coz I dunno what to update also...
Take care people.
^^

~* Huggles and Kisses *~
Huiru

Original Date Posted: Tuesday, January 04 2005

Misunderstandings Really Do Affect All of Us..Real Sad...

Here's a Story I got in my e-mail in which I think I MUST post for everyone to see
Here it goes.

A fatal misunderstanding and the person who love me the most in this world is gone forever.

This is a true story, taken from "Family" (dictated by LD, edited by LSX, translated by SaFe).

Cruel misunderstandings one after another disrupted the blissful footsteps to our family. Our original intend of having Mother enjoy some quiet and peaceful moments in her remaining years with us went terribly wrong as destiny's secret is finally revealed at a price, every thing became too late.

Just two years after our marriage, hubby brought up the idea of asking Mother to move from the rural hometown and spend her remaining years with us. Hubby's father passed away while he was still very young. Mother endured much hardship and struggled all on her own to provide for him, see him through to a university degree. You could say that she suffered a great deal and did everything you could expect of a woman to bring hubby to where he is today.

I immediately agreed and started packing the spare room, which has a balcony facing the South to let her enjoy the sunshine and plant some greenery. Hubby stood in the bright room, and suddenly just picked me up and started spinning round and round. As I begged him to put me down, hesaid: "Lets go fetch mother."

Hubby is tall and big sized and I love to rest on his chest and enjoy the feeling that he could pick me up at any moment put the tiny me into his pockets. Whenever we have an argument and both refuses to back down, he would pick me up and spin me over his head continuously until I surrender and beg for mercy. I became addicted to this kind of panic-joy feeling.

Mother brought along her country-side habits and lifestyle with her. For example; I am so used to buying flowers to decorate the living room, she could not stand it and would comment: "I do not know how you young people spend your money, why do you buy flowers for? You also can't eat the flowers!" I smiled and said: "Mum, with flowers in the house, our mood will also become better." Mother continues to grumble away, and hubby smiled: "Mum, this is a city-people's habit; slowly you will get use to it."

Mother stopped saying anything. But every time thereafter, whenever I came home with flowers, she would ask me how much it costs. I told her and she would shake her head and express displeasure. Sometimes, when I come home with lots of shopping bags, she would ask each and every item how much they cost, I would tell her honestly and she would get even more upset about it. Hubby playfully pinched my nose and said: "You little! fool, just don't tell her the full price of everything would solve it." There begins the friction to our otherwise happy lifestyle.

Mother hates it most when hubby wakes up early to prepare the breakfast. In your view, how could the man of the house cook for the wife? At the breakfast table, mother facial expression is always like the dark clouds before a thunderstorm and I would pretend not to notice. She would use her chopsticks and make a lot of noise with it as her silent protest. As I am a dance teacher in the Children's Palace and is exhausted from a long day of dancing around, I do not wish to give up the luxury of that additional few minutes in the comfort of my bed and hence I turned a deaf ear to all the protest mother makes.

From time to time, mother would help out with some housework, but soon her help created additional work for me. For example: she would keep all kinds of plastic bags accumulating them so that she sell them later on, and that resulted in our house being filled with all the trash bags; she would scrimp on dish washing detergent when helping to wash the dishes and so as not to hurt her feelings, I would quietly wash they again. One day, late at night, mother saw me quietly washing the dishes, and "Bam" she slams her bedroom door and cried very loudly in her room. Hubby was placed in a difficult position, and after that, he did not speak to me for that entire night. I pretended to be a spoilt child, tried acting cute, but he totally ignored me. I got mad and asked him: "What did I do wrong?" Hubby stared at me and said: "Can't you just give in to her once? we couldn't possibly die eating from a bowl however unclean it is, right?"

After that incident, for a long period of time, mother did not speak to me and you can feel that there is a very awkward feeling hanging in the house. During that period of cold war, hubby was caught in dilemma as to who to please.

In order to stop her son from having to prepare breakfast, mother took on the "all important" task of preparing breakfast without any prompting. At the breakfast table, mother would look at hubby happily eating his breakfast and cast that reprimanding stare at me for having failed to perform my duty as a wife. To avoid the embarrassing breakfast situation, I resorted to buying my own breakfast on my way to work.

That night, while in bed, hubby was a little upset and asked me: "LD, is it because you think that mum's cooking is not clean that's why you chose not to eat at home?" He then turned his back on me and left me alone in tears as feeling of unfairness overwhelmed me. After some time, hubby sighed: "LD, just for me, can you have breakfast at home?" I am left with no choice but to return to the breakfast table.

The next morning, I was having porridge prepared by mother and I felt a sudden churn in my stomach and everything inside seem to be rushing up my throat. I tried to suppress the urge to throw up but I couldn't. I threw down the bowl and rushed into the washroom and vomited everything out. Just as I was catching my breath, I saw mother crying and grumbling very loudly in her dialect, hubby was standing at the washroom doorway staring at me with fire burning in his eyes. I opened my mouth but no words came out of it, I really didn't mean it.

We had our very first big fight that day; mother took a look at us, then stood up and slowly made her way out of the house. Hubby gave me a final stare in the eye and followed mother down the stairs.For three days, hubby did not return home, not even a phone call. I was so furious, since mother arrived; I had been trying my best and putting up with her, what else do you want me to do? For no reason, I keep having the feeling to throw up and I simply have not appetite for food, coupled with all the events happening at home, I was at the low point in my life. Finally, a colleague said: "LD, you look terrible, you should go and see a doctor."

The doctor confirmed that I am pregnant. Now it became clear to me why I threw up that fateful morning, a sense of sadness floated through that otherwise happy news. Why didn't hubby, and mother who had been through this before, thought of the possibility of this being the reason that day? At the hospital entrance, I saw my hubby standing there. It had only been three days, but he looked haggard. I had wanted to turn and leave, but one look at him and my heart soften, I couldn't resist and called out to him. He followed my voice and finally found me but he pretended that he doesn't know me; he has that disgusted look in his eyes that cut right through my heart.

I told myself not to look at him anymore, and hail a cab. At that moment, I have such a strong urge inside me to shout to my hubby: "Darling, I am having your baby!" and have him lift me up and spin me round in circles of joy. What I wanted didn't happen and as I sat in the cab, my tears started rolling down. Why? Why our love couldn't even withstand the test of one fight? Back home, I lay on the bed thinking about my hubby, and the disgusted look in his eyes. I cried and wet the corner of the blanket.That night, sound of the drawers opening woke me up. I switched on the lights and I saw hubby with tears rolling down his face. He was removing the money. I stared at him in silence; he ignored me, took the bank deposit book and some money and left the house. Maybe he really intends to leave me for good. What a rational man, so clear cut in love and money matters. I gave a few dried laugh and tears starting streaming down again.

The next day, I did not go to work. I wanted to clear this out and have a good talk with hubby. I reached his office and his secretary gave me a weird look and said: "Mr Tan's mother had a traffic accident and is now in the hospital." I stood there in shock. I rushed to the hospital and by the time I found hubby, mother had already passed away. Hubby did not look at me, his face was expressionless.

I looked at mother's pale white and thin face and I couldn't control the tears in my eyes. My god, how could this happen? Throughout the furneral, hubby did say a single word to me, with only the occasional disgusted stare at me. I only managed to find out brief facts about the accident from other people. That day, after mother left the house, she walked in dazed toward the bus stop, apparently intending to go back to her old house back in the country-side. As hubby ran after her, she tried to walk faster and as she tried to cross the street, a public bus came and hit her...I finally understood how much hubby must hate me, if I had not thrown up that morning, if we had not quarreled, if...In his heart, I am indirectly the killer of his mother.

Part 2

and end...Hubby moved into mother's room and came home every night with a strong liquor smell on him. And me, I am buried under the guilt and self pity and could hardly breathe. I wanted to explain to him, tell him that we are going to have our baby soon, but each time, I saw the dead look in his eyes, all the words I have at the brink of my mouth just fell back in. I had rather he hit me real hard or give me a big and thorough scolding though none of these events happening had been my fault at all.

Many days of suffocating silence went by and as the days went by, hubby came home later and later. The deadlock between us continues, we were living together like strangers who don't know each other. I am like the dead knot in his heart.One day, I passed by a western restaurant, looking into the glass window, I saw hubby and a girl sitting facing each other and he very lightly brushed her hair for her, I understood what it meant. After recovering from that moment of shock, I entered the restaurant, stood in front of my hubby and stared hard at him, not a tear in my eyes. I have nothing to say to him, and there is no need to say anything.

The girl looked at me, looks at hubby, stands up and wanted to go, hubby stretched out his hand and stopped her. He stared back at me, challenging me. I can only hear my slow heart beat, beating, one by one as if at the brink of death. I eventually backed down, if I had stood that any longer, I will collapse together with the baby inside me.That night, he did not come home, he had chosen to use that as a way to indicate to me: Following mother's death, so did our love for each other. He did not come home anymore after that. Sometimes, when I returned home from work, I can tell that the cupboard had been touched - he had returned to take some of his stuff.

I no longer wish to call him; the initial desire to explain everything to him vanished.

I lived alone; I go for my medical checkups alone, my heart breaks again and again every time I see a guy carefully helping his wife through the physical examination. My office colleagues hinted to me to consider aborting the baby, I told them No, I will not. I insisted on having to this baby, perhaps it is my way of repaying mother for causing her death.

One day, I came home and I saw hubby sitting in the living room. The whole house was filled with cigarette smoke. On the coffee table, there was this piece of paper. I know what it is all about without even looking at it.In the two months plus of living alone, I have gradually learned to find peace within myself. I looked at him, removed my hat and said: "You wait a while, I will sign." He looked at me, mixed feelings in his eyes, just like mine. As I hang up my coat, I keep repeating to myself "You cannot cry, you cannot cry..." my eyes hurt terribly, but I refused to let tears come out from there.

After I hung up my coat, hubby's eyes stared fixed at my bulging tummy. I smiled, walked over to the coffee table and pull e paper towards me. Without even looking at what it says, I signed my name on it and pushed the paper to him."LD, you are pregnant?"

Since mother's accident, this is the first time he spoke to me. I could not control my tears any further and they fell like raindrops. I said: "Yes, but its ok, you can leave now." He did not go, in the dark, we sat, facing each other.

Hubby slowly moved over me, his tears wet the blanket. In my heart, everything seem so far away, so far that even if I sprint, I could never reach them.

I cannot remember how many times he repeated "sorry" to me, I had originally thought that I would forgive him, but now I can't. In the western restaurant, in front of that girl, that cold cold look in his eyes, I will never forget, ever. We have drawn such deep deep scares in each other's heart. For me, its unintentional; for him, totally intentional.

I had been waiting for this moment of reconciliation, but I realized now, what had gone past is gone forever and could not repeated. Other than the thought of the baby inside me that would bring some warmth to my heart, I am totally cold towards him, I no longer eat anything he buys for me, I don't take any presents from him and I stopped talking to him. From the moment I signed on that piece of paper, marriage and love had vanished from my heart.

Sometimes, hubby will try to come into the bedroom, but when he walks in, I will walk out to the living room. He had no choice but to sleep in mother's room. At night, from his room, I can hear light sounds of groaning, I kept quiet. This used to be his trick; last time, whenever I ignore him, he would fake illness and I will surrender and find out what is wrong with him, he would then grab me and laugh. He have forgotten that last time, I cared for him and am concerned because there is love, but now, what is there between us?

Hubby's groaning came on and off continuing all the way till baby was born. Almost everyday, he would buy something for the baby, infant products, children products and books that kids like to read. Bags and bags of it stacked inside his room till it is full. I know he is trying to use this to reach out to me, but I am no longer moved by his actions. He has no choice but to lock himself in his room and I can hear his typing away on his computer keyboard, maybe he is now addicted to web surfing, but none of that matters to me anymore.

It was sometime towards the end of spring in the following year, one late night, I screamed because of a sudden stomach pain, hubby came rushing into the room, its like he did not change and sleep, and had been waiting for this moment. He carried me and ran down the stairs, stopped a car, holding my hand very tightly and kept wiping the sweat off my brown, throughout the journey to the hospital. Once we reached the hospital, he carried me and hurried into the delivery suite. Lying on the back of his skinny but warmth body, a thought crossed my mind: In my lifetime, who else would love me as much as he did? He held the delivery suite door opened and watch me go in, his warm eyes caused me to managed a smile at him despite my contraction pain.

Coming out of the delivery room, hubby looked at me and our son, his eyes tear with joy and he kept smiling. I reached out and touched his hand.Hubby looked at me, smiling and then he slowly collapsed onto the floor. I cried out for him in pain... He smiled, but without opening that tired eyes of his... I had thought that I would never shed any tear for him, but the truth is, I have never felt a deeper pain cutting through my body at that moment.

Doctor said that by the time hubby discovered he had liver cancer, it was already in terminal stage and it was a miracle that he managed to last this long. I asked the doctor when did he first discover he had cancer? Doctor said about 5 months ago and consoled me saying: "Prepare for his funeral." I disregarded the nurse's objection and rushed home, I went into his room and checked his computer, and a suffocating pain hits me.

Hubby's cancer was discovered 5 months ago, his groaning was real, and I had thought that... the computer showed over 200 thousand words he wrote for our son: "Son, just for you, I have persisted, to be able to take a look at you before I fall, is my biggest wish now... I know that in your life, you will have many happiness and maybe some setbacks, if only I can accompany you throughout that journey, how nice would it be. But daddy now no long has that chance. Daddy has written inside here all the possible difficulties and problems you may encounter during your lifetime, when you meet with these problems, you can refer to daddy's suggestion... Son, after writing these 200 thousand words, I feel as if I have accompanied you through your life journey. To be honest, daddy is very happy. Do love your mother, she has suffered, she is the one who loves you most and also the one who loves me most..."

From play school to primary school, to secondary, university, to work andeven in dealing with questions of love, everything big and small was written there.

Hubby has also written a letter for me:"My dear, to marry you is my biggest happiness, forgive me for the pain I have caused you, forgive me for not telling you my illness, because I want to see you be in a joyful mood waiting for the arrival of our baby... My dear, if you cried, it means that you have forgiven me and I would smile, thank you for loving me... These presents, I'm afraid I cannot give them to our son personally, could you help me to give some of them to him every year, the dates on what to give when are all written on the packaging..."

Going back to the hospital, hubby is still in coma. I brought our son over and place him beside him. I said: "Open your eyes and smile, I want our son to remember being in the warmth of your arms..."He struggled to open his eyes and managed a weak smile. Our son still in his arms was happily waving his tiny hands in the air. I press the button on the camera and the sound of the shutter rang thought the air as tears slowly rolled down my face...

The end...

So couples out there. Dont make the same mistake as the above story ok?Its really hard for u to find a partner which shares the next half of your life together.

Lots of love
HuiRu

~* Currently Listening To: Madonna - Take a Bow *~
~* Mood: Still Missing My Dear Badly *~

Rdm Thoughs For the Day

Ok look here..
I'm aint no Beaut.
So dont come cursing me over something small...

Its juz a thought.Well...

For my rdm thoughts of the day.......
Lets say first...
No offence Guys.
I wonder it all the time....
Why do guys always go for looks and figure in a girl?
Is it because they feel less humilated when going out or is it because they get to show off their girlfriend to the rest of their friends.
Saying how beautiful their girlfriends are.
I dont know...
You guys are pretty hard to understand at times.
Well look here.A girl is more than just a wrapping on the outside...
What I think its the inside that counts.
Those guys who got sore by now pretty much thinks I'm still single and is an old hag to post such a thing and got dump by guys many times.
Well....... Single? Kinda...A hag? Nah... I'm only 19
Too young to be a hag =p
Anyway Chill down guys...
I mean like so what the girl got looks and figure.
If her personality suxs. She's equally as bad.
Even if guys goes out with her. There is a high possibility u get humilated anyway..
Its just sooner or later. Neither am I saying that girls with looks suxs.
I know some nice looking girls with very good personality. Both in my own country and others. What I'm trying to say that.... Dont contridict girls by their looks. Even plump, not so good looking girls have feelings u know.
Maybe this is how guys are.
From what I see with my own eyes.

Sees a cute girl>targets>bf gf>girl got laid by the guy>guy runs away

There are nice guys out there. I know that.
Nice guys are almost extinct. U can bet on that. 1/10 guys in these world r nice. The rest are well.......
Not so nice...Well... Trust me.
I'll be frank. I'm the type which can categorize under the "Fat Section".
Well so be it.
As long as my dear treats me well and sees me from who I am in the inside and not the outside I'm very very happy already.
Guys....... guys......... Wake up... No matter how nice and beautiful a flower is.
It will wrinkled and wilter one day..... Its just a matter of time.Why not get a nice girl with pleasent personality rather than a snobblish girl with good looks and figure but yet, a bad personality. If I was a guy. I rather choose a not so good looking girl but yet she's caring and nice to everyone.
I look into people for personality not wrapping
I'm not defending nor insulting either sexes here..
I'm just speaking my thoughts.
Otherwise the subject heading wouldnt be "Rdm Thoughs For the Day"

Neat eh?
Hehehe.......

Anyway thats my 2 cents

Origianl Date Posted: Wednesday, October 6 2004

Updates updates~~!!!

Wee... Long time no see my blog.. Its been a while since I updated you ^^
Hows life everyone?
Today is SMA day and thus~~ Half day of school~!!~!~~!~!YAy~~So happy... Hmm.. What has happened to me since the last update? Well... Lets see.... At last I patched with my darling, Jason.
Not the jason in my class..Its someone else..Well... He's two yrs younger than me but I think I Can accept that fact bout it since he's so sweet and caring..
I kinda like it when he's jealous over something I do.. This really shows he cares ^^
Hehehehe...
Looks like I can understand why my friend like to make her boyfriend jealous. Thou it is kinda annoying at times to listen to him nag nag nag...
Enough bout my love life.. Now it's school life ^^At last my group finished the Preliminary Report and handed up to our supervisor, Mr Ying, and the lecturer in charged of our Presentation ^^...
Thus our topic today is fixed... Designing a 'Man Overboard Indicating Device'. So we have came up with the design and kinda the calculations for it..
Hehehehe... But we still need to find a high frequency welding machine to make our Proto Type out and finally make the final product.My group is one of those who need to go for exhibition at next Feburary 2005, so we need to finish the whole project in 6 months..
Kinda super rush right? =pAh well...
We can managed....Oh ya... I Wanna rant also...Recently Joyce had a little fight with Bee and Mel... Thus... Both of them are bad mouthing each other..
And guess what?I'm the person who is stuck in the middle of those two... Joyce says that Bee and Mel wants me in the FYP group is because of my good computer skills...Very saddening to hear this ya?I rather that I Was kept in the dark about this. Very very depressing to hear all these things..And then Bee and Mel says all sorts of things bout Joyce also...
Say that she's a good story teller and lier... Very selfish and stuffs...Then the otherway around Joyce says that Bee and Mel are juz a couple of people who only know how to make use of people.. And when the usage value is over. They kicked them to one side..
I really dunno who to believe... I'm so vexed right now...SAVE ME~!!!!!What a day.... Three years in poly and in the same class.. Why cant they just get along??? I'm the most miserable one ya know?
Having to please both parties and cant afford to offend anyone of them...Come on.. Its not that I dont like them or anything.. I really treat them as my friends, and I dont like to see friends fight like enemies ya...
I wonder why such things runs in my family... That happened to both my elder brother and sister also... Looks like I'm next to try it out...Sad~Come on..
If I really have one wish.. I'd wish that all the enemies in the whole world be friends.. And finally we can obtain world peace...
Thats what I really wish for...Ah well... I'll side track abit..Earlier on I said is SMA day right?They have a party at labordor park and all SMA students are welcome to join...
Me. Bee, Erny and Mel will be going to it...Bee and Erny go on their on and I'm waiting for Mel's meetin to be over so that we can rush over to the party.It is from 6pm to 12 am.. Cool ya?But I dont know how am I gonna get home =/
No money to take the taxi and stuffs >.<
Ah well... I think mel's meeting should be over soon... So I shall stop this update here...
And I try to update this everyday if possible coz I'm not the type who like to write diary everyday =p
Hehehe...
So long Folks..

Original Date Posted: Friday, October 1 2004

So Stress Out!

I'm pratically feeling fuck up right now.
Why? Coz I had a fight with my dear and my elder sister...
Well the dear part is that we settle things out already. For he wasnt in a good mood that morning and I'm practically pissed off at him for scolding me over a silly game call Gunbound.
I juz woke up only.
Dont expect me to play VERY WELL right?
Lol...Anywayz I miss him lots..
As for my elder sister part...
She is being unreasonable AGAIN.And thus? COLD WAR~~~Lol....
I have nothing to talk to my elder brother also. Dunno why coz he always screw up my computer.
So I dunno to smile or be angry...
And my mom is kinda tired over such a situation also...
I juz hope I can quickly work. Find a room to rent outside and move out. At least dont have to see my elder sis's face.I know she dotes on me...
But her temper is too fistey for my taste...
My mom says when she scolds me just keep quiet. When I did, she says I show her attitude. Wat a life...And right now I'm having my exams...
Lol.. I still dont care much coz I prepare to fail my papers...
Like I give a damn?Wahahaha...
Sad case....
And my final year project...
Practically rushing like crap... And some fiancial problems...
I dunno...
How I wish I can just disappear from the surface of this world...
Then no troubles and problems....
*Sighs*

School school school!!!

Wahahaha... School has started and its been a while since I updated this blog of mine.Lol... So how is everyone in the site? Doing well I Supposed? ^^So tried.... 2 more week till my term test..
Imma Singapore Poly yr3 student currently studying in Marine Engineering..
Wahahaha... Why am I using the comp in school? Lets just say my elder brother doesnt wish to go to work and thus hogging onto the computer for all I know... I'm so tired... I wanna sleep and I miss my dear lots lots.. I wonder what is he doing now...
Lets see.. What have I need to update... I gotten myself a boyfriend in which plays the same game as I used to play which is Gunbound. Hehehe somehow the same interests all around hehehehe. I recently changed my phone twice... I gotten myself a Sony Ericsson k700i in which I used it for 3 days then sold it for a Samsung D410C...
I know I know... Scold me crazy for all I Care... Coz most of my friends said that to me already. Hehehehe. So I'm immued to it... Juz went out with an outing with my dear dear (part time one which is a gal so dont get the wong idea. Wahahaha. Chingy and doggie(tk). No.. I'm not a lesbian either so dont get that wrong idea too... Kekekeke) We went to orchard and had our dinner at baker's inn and recently had dinner together at Jurong Point in which my lesson ended at 2.30pm that day and I rotted in the Library till 7.45pm before I went to meet them at Dover MRT station (Coz both of them have Jap Class in the evening. Someone pity me please!!!!!)... So good of me? Lets juz say I do not wish to go home. And if I do. I wish not to travel to dover after I did coz I live in Woodlands... Which is pretty far away from school...
So you guys can guess huh? hehehe..Recently watched the movie with my group of Gunbound friends at Cineleisure. Which is House of Flying Daggers...
The show is way stupid... No beginning and ending for all I saw.. Me and Kaiwen practically almost fell asleep during the movie.. Since Candy (Yue Yu) wants to watch it. Me and another 3 friends went with her wishes. Since 3 of them ARE under 16 --" so we cant watch the NC16 show. There's one which is quite nice to watch. Collerate(Dunno how I spell it) Gonna watch Alien VS Predator this coming 19th August with Jason and his friend from America and after that we'll go to the Raiders Lan Shop at Causeway point to play Gunbound. Wahahaha... See the pros in action!!! Both of them are Blue Dragon account people...
So dont expect them to miss their shots... Even I got scared by them at times too.Recently I got addicted onto CS~ which seems fun... I saw a CS clip of the 5 top players in the world... The best player is Hilton (18 yrs old) from America... They are from the guild xstat...
No one seems to be able to kill them at all.... I wish to be like them too.. Wahahahaha... But my reaction suxs to the end in which I think I will never master this game at all... Hehehhee... My dear still havent sms me yet.. From what I guess is that he is still sleeping soundly....
I guess he climbed up to watch the oylmpics... 100% he did that otherwise he's already asleep since 10.35pm last night. I'm gonna nag at him when I reach home... His house is only 2 blocks away from mine... I live in blk 855 and he lives in Blk 853.. I miss him lots lots.. Thou I spent my whole afternoon at his house... His sister is super HOT! Really... Good figure and looks... Hehehehe...
What else to update... Hmm.... Just using the computer in the library right now and nothing much to say.. other than having my constant headache as usual... Wahahahah... Recently my mom keep like to ask me what time will I go home...
Here comes the time restriction again.... Sad case --""Cant I have more freedom? Its not as if I'm outside commiting crime and stuffs or I'm hook onto drugs and all the craps and watever you and I can think or name. Wahahaha... No naughty thoughts ok?=POk ok.... Looks like I need to buckle up for my term test otherwise I think I'd get retained badly if I dont....
Since Singapore Polytechnic took away the sub paper system and they shorten our holidays by 1 MONTH!!!!WTF ($#&%(#@&$(_~^$(_#@^$(!^%(#@!^%(^#@!%(@!^%&$@%@This is so unfair!!!!! The holidays is even shorter than the secondary school kids and our 2nd Semester starts at 16 Dec.. What is the world coming to? Sad sad sad!!!The Final Year Project is a pain in the neck..
Since our product needs to be on exhibition thus we need to finish it by THIS yr end of December in which other groups have one whole year to complete it... Its so stressful...
Ah well... What to do... Now poly life is like no difference from JC.... Work hard all fellow Poly friends out there... Must rely study hard already....Ok ok I shall end this long winded blog here..
Hehehehe...
Later~~

Hugs and Kisses,
~`HuiRu`~

Original Date Posted: Monday, August 16 2004

Currently at Work

Hello there...
Lets see... What I Can say now is I'm at work and I'm very tired... I didnt seem to have enough sleep at all.
My brother ran away from home last friday morning.. And I got pretty upset at work coz he msg me hurtful things via SMS.
Saying that I'm really happy that he isnt staying in that house anymore and all sort of stuffs...
But me and my mom managed to get him to come home by night time....I practically beg him to come back...
Really first time in my whole life I have to beg someone like that.But he's my elder brother after all...I guess I have to do it...Well he's back already. But he always lock himself in his room playing the comp...I talked to him less than 4 sentences since he came home...
Looks like this is gonna be tough.
Poor me.Hahahaha


Original Date Posted: Sunday, 20 June 2004

Ice Skating

Hey there,today my friend Candy(Yue Yu) and Cookie(Nicholes), pulled me go ice skating at Jurong Entertainment Center and I was really at my wits... Coz I do not know how to ice skate among all the friends who went there.
How embarrassing.. Then when finally I got the hang of it. Our time is up and its bout time to go home..
Nevermind. I accompanied Candy and her sister, together with SgBoyLala to Jurong Point to help them choose a father's day present for their dad.After buying the CDs we want. Then we went to the arcade to play Dance Dance Revolution. And then we saw two Uncles...
And they r really 50++ Dance really well in hard mode. Then ended up we went to play Para Para and tell you sometime.at first I didnt dare to play till they forced me to and I found it really fun and I spent the next whole hr playing it ^^And right now both my legs and arms are sore =P

*actually I had a little confession to make. I had a crush on nicholes. Dear if your reading this dont misunderstand.. This thing happened during june de okies? Love u.. *muackz*

Original posted: Saturday, June 19, 2004

Yay

I got myself another new blog. I wanna start afresh without any hassles and stuffs okies?
Here we go. I'll practically move over most of the post from the old blog to the new one. So dun be surprized I post so much in a day okies? ^^